dream of my new marriage. my passed parents prepared me for new marriage. my 2nd elder brother trusted to manage custom and celebration team from the village, Zhudajiu. I saw my parents-in-law, my fiance, who is shy free and visited us in her house the night before rite. I saw clear I never saw here. last week banks’ call for returning credit deficit were frequent. I buzzed my 2nd brother, kid brother and 2nd sister. my kid brother, likely the only one who affordable to help, always felt frustrated upon my conversation or appeal, refuted me 2 times, but finally called me back last Saturday. he got all my credit card number, likely trying to cancel them. he said banks’ call disrupted him a lot and can’t bear it without actively dealt my problem. God, no matter how the problem large, I always look my business bright in the end. but I really don’t know how to return the ￥70000 in my so pinched situation. this month my salary in 3 serie months as low as ￥1800. I had to borrow to live up. my son woz last Friday night visited my dorm. we ate grilled mutton as scheduled. I don’t feel like to put him in panic of economic slump. he more and more silent upon my trying keep insistent life we deserve.God, dad, I want get through hardness alone, with hope and prayer. God, I’m confident my debt, ￥75000, is not a big sin. help me reverifying it. this spring chill lingers, and put my dorm quite uncomfortable. bring me sooner summer heat with life we enjoy. bring me sooner my Royal China for grace. save Japan from earthquake suffering, save my crowned Queen, Asoh Yukiko, and show us the union fasten our 2 nations in close eastern Asia.